The Writer's Circle

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by Blaxel411 » Sun Oct 18, 2015 1:09 am

Thanks guys. I guess i just have to fight through the lack of motivation.
I think we can all agree that i`m a great asset to the human race.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by Aren142 » Sun Oct 18, 2015 9:12 pm

Well, my brain farted and words came out so might as well throw them at the competition. Do I post it here or PM it in?
<Kaeetayel> Go for a team entirely composed of Eeveelutions
<Princess> that's effort
<Princess> I need to buy the stones/go to rocks/make them happy/touch Eevee
<Kaeetayel> The last one doesn't sound too bad

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by Kriken » Sun Oct 18, 2015 10:11 pm

Post it here.

I'm assuming it's how we've done previous writing competitions in this thread, anyway.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by Aren142 » Sun Oct 18, 2015 10:20 pm

Suppose it'd make sense since other people would be able to read and comment. So, I'll do that. It's short at the moment, but it's just a thing that happened without warning. What it's supposed to be is the opening extract of this novel thing I've been "working on" for multiple years. Or at least the second draft. So, if it's not drawing you in, it'll need some significant work.
A simple touch. That’s all it takes for me to change something beyond recognition. To destroy it. That thought weighs heavy on my mind. It always does. Even when doing something as simple as carrying a small box of supplies along a road. It’s there, nagging away at my mind. In fact, it is even more prominent now. At any moment, the box of supplies could be gone. Replaced by something of no use to anyone. I wear gloves, hoping that by not touching the box directly I can prevent such an eventuality. I don’t know if it works in practice. I still don’t know what I’m capable of. I don’t really want to find out, but I know I will at some point. I can’t control it. That thought scares me. That’s the worst part of it. Fear triggers it. I’m scared of it and it feeds off that fear.

I am consumed by these thought processes constantly repeating themselves. They distract me from the world outside my head. It makes carrying a box along a road so difficult. My mind doesn’t register that I’m about to walk into someone until it’s almost too late. I have too many brushes of shoulders with random strangers. So many grown adults. They’re all so much bigger than me. Someone is bound to knock me over and spill the contents of my box everywhere. I know that I am as physically strong as them, but I’m not concentrating. All these people in sharp outfits are in a hurry and have conviction in getting to their destinations. I don’t have that. Sure, I’m almost old enough to be one of them. But I’m so far from it in reality. Yes, I have a destination in mind, but I don’t have to get there by a certain time. I don’t even need to go there. It’s not a job. It’s just a place I can feel safe. It’s not home, but it’ll do. I think the others feel the same way. We don’t exactly get along, but we’re friends because we’re all in the same situation. It’s not ideal, but we can at least share it with each other and make the best of it.

It’s nice to be able to think of the others. They can distract me from my other thoughts. If only briefly. They have helped me cope with it. With everything that’s happened recently. I want to repay them for helping me, but I don’t really know how. Hopefully the contents of the box I carry can go some way towards that.
Last edited by Aren142 on Tue Oct 20, 2015 7:38 pm, edited 2 times in total.
<Kaeetayel> Go for a team entirely composed of Eeveelutions
<Princess> that's effort
<Princess> I need to buy the stones/go to rocks/make them happy/touch Eevee
<Kaeetayel> The last one doesn't sound too bad

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by ChaosControl » Mon Oct 19, 2015 2:37 pm

Awww, what's in the gooseberry fool box????

Good stuff. It definitely pulled me in :D

And yes, if everyone could post their entries in the thread that's be great thanks.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by kerr9000 » Mon Oct 19, 2015 3:22 pm

This is the thing I pvt'd you my copy of yeah? If so can you post it no idea what I have done with it my end lol

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by Ghost » Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:29 am

masa wrote:
....
When i saw
Your open heart
I thought it was
A work of art

When i bared
My open chest
I know you were
Less than impressed

Perhaps i never
Caught your eyes
Because they sought
Passion's demise

Perhaps you never
Met my gaze
Because you felt
Too strong a blaze

When i held you
I felt your pulse
But now i wonder
Was it just false?

When we embraced
What did you feel?
I need to know
So my soul can heal.

Perhaps you never
Loved me for me
Only for what you
Thought i could be.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by masa » Wed Oct 21, 2015 10:23 am

Well i wrote another poem but idk if itll make kittens cry
.....
When the winds scream high,
In the garden of the sky,
I wonder who you really are,
If your soul has flown away too far
Or it simply sits, comfortably at home
Doing as the Romans do in Rome.
I would scour the whole world
For a way to see your heart unfurled
If only I thought it could be so
That you would return love's soft glow.
A smile, a touch, an happy embrace
But compared to the beauty of your face
These things merely stoke the cinders
That my knowledge of your heart hinders.
Your soul is full of charm and wonder
But I know it would tear mine asunder
If I asked you to be my lover.

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by ChaosControl » Wed Oct 21, 2015 8:11 pm

That was lovely.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by masa » Thu Oct 22, 2015 12:18 am

Have another one i guess??
...
The feelings that my heart attires
Cannot restrict its boundless desires.
I would drape myself in a shawl
So i may feel nothing at all
As wise words tinge my every thought
But i would heed them not.

Dare my eyes be burnt with wonder
Upon the visage of your image i do hunger.
But what of love, with his coy little grin?
He will never let the right one in.
Will you be with me, dust to dusk?
Or must i be to you an empty husk?

If my heart were made of glass
I would still cry out Alas!
With the lightest touch it would shatter
But even then would it matter?
As I'll never feel your warm carress
Above the chambers of my chest.

Even if i love with all my might
There's still the difference of our height
And even if i changed my clothes
Still i would be one of Those.
And i know that i can't ever be
Someone you would want to see.

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by ChaosControl » Thu Oct 22, 2015 3:11 am

"As wise words tinge my every thought
But I would need them not"

So horribly true. I wish I could block out all the advice swirling around my head constantly and continue on in blissful ignorance...
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by weakboson » Sun Oct 25, 2015 2:28 am

I like to poem so will contribute something when I can.

masa you're doing god's work but if I had to criticize I'd say be careful: if a rhyme is obvious it makes the verse vapid, and if you overcomplicate a phrase you'll end up with a mixed up meter.

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by weakboson » Sun Oct 25, 2015 2:42 am

Ok this will do. I am mostly interested in songs so that's what you get.
Don't bother getting up this morning
You need to save yourself for night
You're on a strange and long road now
Forget it's good to know you're right

Listen keen and be encouraged
It's in the small things people say
Careful don't appear too happy
Don't want to give yourself away

Sometimes you want to scream out
Almost as if you're not ashamed
And think about how good you'd feel
If you could actually take the blame

Man, better take a moment
Make sure you've thought it through
Savour that it's come to this
And take the plunge anew

Move quiet, get night vision
Become accustomed to the dark
Think your safer than you've ever been
Feel a peace within your heart

When at last the journey's over
You never know what you might find
Pluck a moment from the stars
Take it with you at all times

Damn she's really something
You can't beleive your luck
Things keep getting better
Until you just don't give a gooseberry fool

Then I see your little flashlights
Search the vaulted sky
But you'll never find me in this place
And you won't find him on high

I kneel before my queen
And swear by all above
I will rip the beating heart
Out of everything I love

Before I am turned away
I will be understood
They say that if you're strong enough
You get to do some good

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by ChaosControl » Sun Oct 25, 2015 3:45 am

We definitely need more people like you around who know stuff about poetry. I have no clue!
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by Kriken » Mon Oct 26, 2015 2:20 am

Sorry for not getting around to writing/posting a story for the comp CC. I'm lazy.

It will happen though. Maybe.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Time*

Post by ChaosControl » Mon Nov 02, 2015 12:58 am

As you may have noticed, I've extended the deadline. You have until 1st December. This might seem like too much time....but you underestimate my laziness.

And since it's the first of November....(uh...2nd of November now....) I was wondering if anyone was going to have a crack at NaNoWriMo? I'm not this year as I'll be occupied with NaKnitMo (crochet has taken over my life...send help)
But if anyone is considering participating and you feel like sharing your stuff so you can get an idea of how you're getting on, feel free. That's what this thread is for, after all. Especially since with novel writing, it's very easy to get disheartened, so posting here might even help keep you motivated!
And taking part in the short story competition might even help get those creative juices flowing. (It can't hurt at least ;). )
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by Rik » Mon Nov 02, 2015 1:25 am

I was umming and aahing over doing NaNoWriMo since a lot of people in uni's creative writing society are doing it so I'd have some writing mates, but given how badly I did at writing stuff over the summer when I had nothing on I doubt I'll do much better now that studying is starting to pick up. I might just aim to get to a midway point with something, idk.
Also, nice poems masa.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by ChaosControl » Mon Nov 02, 2015 6:16 pm

Maybe challenge yourself to do something smaller, a full blown novel can be overwhelming if you've got other stuff going on. But if you're working on a smaller project, that way you can still join in with your writing buddies.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by Kriken » Mon Nov 02, 2015 7:12 pm

Nah. Go big or go home.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by Vtheyoshi » Mon Nov 02, 2015 7:35 pm

I was considering doing NaNoWriMo this year, but a whole novel in a month ain't happening, especially with college and eton mess. That being said, I would like to start writing a novel that I've had in mind for a few years now (dinosaurs in space+"philosophy"+"high concept" sci fi, is very good idea)

Also lol I forgot about deadlines, I will hopefully write something this month, even if it isn't a novel.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by kerr9000 » Mon Nov 02, 2015 8:19 pm

I just finished a novella an erotica based portmanteau its only around 20thousand words so less than half a Namawrimo but In honesty I am too knacked from that to fancy trying to bust out a novel.. I will probably spend the next month trying to tidy that up and get it from its finished 1st draft to a decent state

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by Ghost » Tue Nov 03, 2015 1:30 pm

Totally forgot NaNo was this month. Thanks for reminding me ^_^
This week I'm gonna give a stab at Chaos' awesome competition and then I'll try my hand at NaNo.
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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by Aren142 » Tue Nov 03, 2015 7:15 pm

Kinda forgot about NoNoWriMo this year. Not had any opportunity to plan or anything and not really been in the swing of writing lately so having to give it a miss.
<Kaeetayel> Go for a team entirely composed of Eeveelutions
<Princess> that's effort
<Princess> I need to buy the stones/go to rocks/make them happy/touch Eevee
<Kaeetayel> The last one doesn't sound too bad

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by Aren142 » Tue Nov 10, 2015 6:55 pm

I wrote a thing. It starts with the thing I posted before, with a few minor corrections and edits and then continues on from there. A chapter is starting to take shape, I hope. Though obviously still not finished. It's just what I managed to do last night. Updated competition entry or whatever, I guess. And just something I'd generally like people to read and comment on.
A simple touch. That’s all it takes for me to change something beyond recognition. To destroy it. That thought weighs heavy on my mind. It always does. Even when doing something as simple as carrying a small box of supplies along a road. It’s there, nagging away at my mind. In fact, it is even more prominent now. At any moment, the box of supplies could be gone. Replaced by something of no use to anyone. I wear gloves, hoping that by not touching the box directly I can prevent such an eventuality. I don’t know if it works in practice. I still don’t know what I’m capable of. I don’t really want to find out, but I know I will at some point. I can’t control it. That thought scares me. That’s the worst part of it. Fear triggers it. I’m scared of it and it feeds off that fear.

I am consumed by these thought processes constantly repeating themselves. They distract me from the world outside my head. It makes carrying a box along a road so difficult. My mind doesn’t register that I’m about to walk into someone until it’s almost too late. I have too many brushes of shoulders with random strangers. So many grown adults. They’re all so much bigger than me. Someone is bound to knock me over and spill the contents of my box everywhere. I know that I am as physically strong as them, but I’m not concentrating. All these people in sharp outfits are in a hurry and have conviction in getting to their destinations. I don’t have that. Sure, I’m almost old enough to be one of them. But I’m so far from them in reality. Yes, I have a destination in mind, but I don’t have to get there by a certain time. I don’t even need to go there. It’s not a job. It’s just a place I can feel safe. It’s not home, but it’ll do. I think the others feel the same way. We don’t exactly get along, but we’re friends because we’re all in the same situation. It’s not ideal, but we can at least share it with each other and make the best of it.

It’s nice to be able to think of the others. They can distract me from my other thoughts. If only briefly. They have helped me cope with it. With everything that’s happened recently. I want to repay them for helping me, but I don’t really know how. Hopefully the contents of the box I carry can go some way towards that. It’s not much, but I’m sure some of them will appreciate it.

I slip from the crowd off people into a side street. It’s like an entirely different world. It’s so isolated. Light and sound seems to struggle getting into this gap between buildings. The only hint of the street I’ve just come from is the only other person here. Another nameless businessman with the same appearance as the others. It stands out, striking the high class nature of it into the eyes of any who see it. And yet, it’s so dull. They’re all the same. With the nature of my upbringing, I think I was expected to marry someone like that. Avoiding that is just about the only positive I can get from what has happened. This particular man avoids me. He strolls past with the same hurried pace, that expressionless face refusing to acknowledge I exist. That’s for the best. I don’t want to be noticed.

The side street ends and I’m back out into a crowded space. This street is so different to the previous one. It is different to how I normally know it. There is no massive flow of movement. People are standing around. These people seem a lot more casual. There is no intent other than to stand and stare. I don’t know what they’re staring at. I can hear a single person shouting over the various everyday noises of the city. As I make my way around the mass of people, I catch sight of a man standing at the forefront of everyone’s attention. He is standing on something to give him height over the crowd. My curiosity rises and I stop. I want to know what this man is saying that has captivated the attention of so many people.

“These people hide amongst us,” he calls out, “but don’t be fooled. They are not like us. They are different and they are dangerous! They are a threat to all of us!”

People around me murmur amongst themselves. I can’t pinpoint what any of them are saying in a coherent way though. I don’t need to though. I can tell this man is trying to preach some kind of hatred. I have enough problems as it is, I don’t need to be dedicating some part of myself to hate people I don’t even know. I make sure that I am still gripping onto my box and start to walk away. I can hear the preacher behind me, continuing his propaganda.

“The worst part of all this?” the man asks the crowd rhetorically, “Security knows about them, but don’t want to tell us. The people who are supposed to protect us won’t tell us the truth about the dangers we face! Vurusia’s most wanted, serial arsonist Ross Harkins. He is one of them!”

Ross Harkins. I halt at the mention of that name. Panic hits me. I can feel my heartbeat hastening and my grip on the box tightening. Could it be…? Could the people that this man is telling the world about be…?

“They tell us that he is dangerous and a threat. But how many of us really know why he is dangerous? I do! I have seen him!” the man proudly declares, prompting more murmurs from the crowd, “Fire from his hands! There is no other way I can describe it. He held out his hands and there was fire. It is unnatural and it is terrifying. He can create fire from nothing. That’s why he is dangerous! That’s why all of them are dangerous! Security could have used him to warn us of their kind! Instead, they choose to hide these monsters and let them roam free! They are dangerous and we have no way of knowing who they are! We have been betrayed!”

Us. He’s referring to us. People in the crowd are shouting. Are people buying into all this? If I didn’t know the truth, I would have thought this man was spouting absolute rubbish.

“Proof? You want proof that these monsters exist?” the man shouts, seemingly egging on the crowd.

Each use of the word ‘monster’ is a dagger through my heart. I can’t take this any longer. I have to get out of here. I need to be away from public view. Especially these people. Before….

I look down. It’s too late. The box is gone. In its place is a block of ice and from the block extends a layer that covers my hands. The gloves are gone too. I didn’t realise until it was too late. I couldn’t feel it happening. I don’t notice the cold. I can’t feel it. It is part of me. And it has done this.

I force my hands away from what had been the box and the ice around my hands snaps. The frozen box falls to the floor in front of me and shatters like glass. I recognise some of the shapes that fall from the wreckage as the things I put into it. All of them turned to ice.

“Over there is your proof!”

Shaking, I turn my head to look over my shoulder. The crowd is shuffling around to get a look at me. Above the crowd is the man who was preaching hatred towards people like me and now his finger is stretched out and directing everyone at me. There is such a variety of reactions on the faces that I can see, but they are all silent. Surprise, fear, excitement… Myself, I am overwhelmed by sheer terror. What are they going to do to me?

I stare into the eyes of strangers, locked in place. No one moves. I don’t know how long the standoff lasts. I don’t know what I can say or do. There is no right answer when you have provided someone with evidence of something different that they don’t understand. Their reaction is always going to be negative towards it. I already know that. This is a new and even more frightening extension of that territory. These people have been warned in advance to fear and stand against the new and impossible to understand thing. ‘Monster’ and ‘betrayal’. These words invoke such strong emotions in anybody. It’s no wonder that I got scared and inadvertently revealed myself.

A single shout from the crowd breaks the deadlock. “What are you?”
<Kaeetayel> Go for a team entirely composed of Eeveelutions
<Princess> that's effort
<Princess> I need to buy the stones/go to rocks/make them happy/touch Eevee
<Kaeetayel> The last one doesn't sound too bad

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Re: The Writer's Circle *Competition Deadline Extended*

Post by ChaosControl » Tue Nov 10, 2015 9:20 pm

Oooh. Very interesting! The people needn't worry though, clearly these "monsters" have just been to Rapture and stocked up on Plasmids. Calm down....

The whole time I'm reading I'm trying to get a feel for the setting. I can't quite tell if this is past, present or future yet.
You've got a good amount of both description and dialogue. This is really good so far. I'd love to see this extended into a full opening chapter.

This can count as an updated competition entry. I'm pretty sure so far it's just you and masa that have entered.
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