The SONM Robot Wars Championship THE FINALE

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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by Scapegoat » Wed Sep 07, 2016 2:54 am

troggy watch your back in mafia you know what happens when you steal nick's memes you end up like kappa.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by AlterntiveAntagonist » Wed Sep 07, 2016 5:23 am

sayonara... aniki...
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by D.J » Wed Sep 07, 2016 6:51 am

OrangeRakoon wrote:The two best robots in the tournament both got knocked out :(
Nonsense, Kryten doesn't fight until the 4th round.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by mewthree » Wed Sep 07, 2016 11:41 am

ALL HAIL DESTRUCTOR!!

NYAAARRGGGHHHH!!
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by fluffyKittan » Wed Sep 07, 2016 11:55 am

D.J wrote:
OrangeRakoon wrote:The two best robots in the tournament both got knocked out :(
Nonsense, Kryten doesn't fight until the 4th round.
I think Kryten should be disqualified as he's an android and thus not techincally a robot.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by mewthree » Wed Sep 07, 2016 11:58 am

To qualify as a robot, your robot must have at least one metal part to it.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by D.J » Wed Sep 07, 2016 1:27 pm

fluffyKittan wrote:I think Kryten should be disqualified as he's an android and thus not techincally a robot.
https://youtu.be/poMWgGC82bw?t=15s

Actually he's a series 4000 mechanoid, though sadly he's not the 4000 GTi model and so does not come with realistic toes or a slide back sunroof head.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by Kappa » Wed Sep 07, 2016 9:53 pm

Troggy wrote:Due to mass hatred and scorn over the loss of the fan favourite: The Heinz Automato57, I have decided to partake in some...
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As a test of the upcoming RNG voting system, you as the general SONM public can decide the fate of the Automato57! Will he go through, replacing one of the winners, or will he stay in the pit like a loser? You decide!

Be sharpish, though. Voting's over once Group 3's battle starts.
L I V E

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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by ミドリ » Wed Sep 07, 2016 11:08 pm

Commit to your decisions, coward. You need the Automato far more than the Automato needs you.

Strong no from me.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Two BEGIN!*

Post by Troggy » Fri Sep 09, 2016 6:08 pm

Scapegoat wrote:troggy watch your back in mafia you know what happens when you steal nick's memes you end up like kappa.
you were right all along

i will never steal memes ever again

Update tonight, folks! Group Three is coming to town!
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Three Time!*

Post by Troggy » Fri Sep 09, 2016 11:32 pm

LADIES AND GENTS, the waiting is over! It's time for the Group Three battle to begin!

But first, a recap of the last battle. As we remember, the Automato57 was the almighty fan favourite in SONM Robot Wars. It was powerful, fast, adored by the world... It was almost unstoppable! Keyword being 'almost', as the Automato's showmanship caused it to fall in the pit! This caused an outrage, resulting in the use of host influence to see a revised verdict for the Automato... The results are in and it looks like...

THE HEINZ AUTOMATO57 REMAINS KNOCKED OUT OF THE COMPETITION!

What a shame! But, the show must go on... Speaking of which, here's our contestants for Group Three!

Edd (SONM's resident cool dude) entered Jason Statham! Previously a fan favourite in Scapegoat's tournament, will Statham be able to win a match this time around?

Drakeknight has entered a robophobic robot into SONM Robot Wars!(?) Rumoured to have gained his robophobic ways from getting a part-time job as a Tumblr server, will this robot trigger a victory?

Meanwhile, Vtheyoshi has entered fellow Smash 4 player Mewtwoking! As a master of Cloud in Smash 4, who would d-air go after such a Smash Bros elite?

Finally, Pepsi Supreme (Previously known as Corin) has entered Connor! An android tasked with hunting other androids? This should make it quick and simp-
A David Cage Game
oh

Anyway, now we've met our contestants, it's time for the battle, which will take place in the middle of the Frank vs Qrow fight from the Super Ultra Battle Tourney!

3, 2, 1, ACTIVATE

It was a misty afternoon. Frank Martin felt a chill in the air as a drunken Qrow readied his weapon. Frank was about to get in his BMW to better prepare himself for Qrow's attack, when suddenly...
"THAT COUNTS AS A ROBOSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP AND I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT!"
The infamous Robophobic Robot pops out of the misty air, accusing Frank of raping his car. Qrow lost his balance, either from the shock of the appearance or the alcohol, you be the judge.
Soon enough, the commotion caused another competitor to appear out of the mist.
"You have gone against your directive, you robotic nuisance" said Connor, who had been following the Robophobe all through his journey.
"MY DIRECTIVE IS TO TELL PEOPLE OFF FOR BEING ROBOSEXUALS, TA VERY MUCH." The Robophobe replied.
"Why am I even here", muttered a confused Mewtwoking, who was clutching a Gamecube controller by the cable.

Frank decided that all this commotion was going on for far too long. He had to increase his power to wipe out all of these rowdy robots while also being able to fight Qrow afterwards. But how? The only option was clear... He had to break character. Frank ripped off his shirt and jacket, revealing himself to be the almighty Jason Statham! Now, with the necessary power needed to destroy all in his path, Statham started the car and floored it, running straight into Mewtwoking. Mewtwoking was flung over the car and onto the floor with an almighty thump. Honestly, I would have teched that landing, but Mewtwoking could've avoided the attack with a roll, though. Mewtwoking is out (and dead)! Not letting the slaughter of Smash's finest player get to him, Statham speeds right into Connor, smashing his left leg as he speeds by. Connor drops to the ground as the Robophobe continues to explain the importance of his directive. Statham saw the damage, but knew he had to finish off his foe. He turned his car right around, puts the car into H, then whizzed off in Connor's direction.

Connor was struggling to get up, he wanted to apprehend the Robophobe before it was too late. But it was indeed too late, as Statham's car crashes into Connor's head! Connor was hurled far way. Landing in a pile of scrap, left to die. But, before he died, the David Cage android shouted his final word... "SHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUN!"
Statham knew his job was done, so he decided to go home to his fans. He drove off into the sunset, leaving us in a happy ending. Or is it?
The Robophobe looked on in disgust at Statham's rampage. He knew he had to take down Statham. Not for Mewtwoking. Certainly not for Connor. But, for the principle of same-machine marriage! The winners are Jason Statham and the Robophobic Robot!

Meanwhile, Qrow looked at the carnage in shock. "How did this happen so fast?" Qrow spluttered. "How did that man destroy those other folks with only a car? Come to think of it, why did it take us over 4 months to even start fighting in the first place?" He continued.

THE WINNERS ARE JASON STATHAM AND THE ROBOPHOBIC ROBOT! WAHOO!

Wasn't that an adventure, folks? I sure thought it was! Be sure to tell us what you think! In the meantime, though... Come back next time, but not quarter-to-four! That's not when we air SONM Robot Wars!
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Three Time!*

Post by AlterntiveAntagonist » Sat Sep 10, 2016 12:18 am

it's nearly time
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Three Time!*

Post by Scapegoat » Sat Sep 10, 2016 12:35 am

You know, reading this almost makes me consider trying to revitalise my tourney.

but then I remember that luckyman's powers can suck a dick and I should never have let him in the tournament in the first place.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Three Time!*

Post by Edd » Sat Sep 10, 2016 12:44 am

Troggy wrote:Edd (SONM's resident cool dude)
True.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Three Time!*

Post by Troggy » Sat Sep 10, 2016 2:14 am

Scapegoat wrote:but then I remember that luckyman's powers can suck a dick and I should never have let him in the tournament in the first place.
WE FINALLY GOT THE RESULTS TO LUCKYMAN VS JAK, WE DID IT LADS!
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The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming up!*

Post by Troggy » Sun Sep 18, 2016 5:08 pm

Oi, folks! Group Four of the SONM Robot Wars Championship is coming up later tonight!

Tonight, our contestants will be...

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Henry the Hoover!

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Robot Santa!

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Porygon2!

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and a human skeleton!

Who do you think will win?
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Vtheyoshi » Sun Sep 18, 2016 5:17 pm

skeleman and henry must win
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Scapegoat » Sun Sep 18, 2016 6:32 pm

christ troggy spoiler tag that eton mess you nearly gave me a heart attack due to how spooky that skeleton is.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Garf » Sun Sep 18, 2016 7:49 pm

Come On Santa

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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Rik » Sun Sep 18, 2016 8:50 pm

Porygon2 gonna murder you all
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Kappa » Sun Sep 18, 2016 9:26 pm

going for my boy henners, don't eton mess the bed

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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Scapegoat » Sun Sep 18, 2016 9:40 pm

henners is really good at sucking it's his main strong point.
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by Decretum » Sun Sep 18, 2016 9:53 pm

Scote has revealed the true reason he came to the tsf was actually because we whore out henry
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Re: The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four is coming u

Post by D.J » Mon Sep 19, 2016 6:50 am

Henry's gonna suck...





...all of his opponents into oblivion!
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The SONM Robot Wars Championship *Group Four a-go-go!*

Post by Troggy » Mon Sep 19, 2016 8:46 pm

LADIES AND GENTS! THIS SLAMFEST IS ABOUT TO START UP! SO TAKE YOUR SEATS!

It's finally time to start our fourth group battle! But first, as always, let's remind ourselves of the results of Group Three's battle royale! Let's go over to our robot battling man-with-a-plan: Barry Bubbleflaps!
Barry Bubbleflaps wrote:Yes, indeed! The last match was an exciting one to behold for all! At least, it would've been if Vtheyoshi didn't enter such a crap robot. It didn't bloody do anything half the time! Then that Pepsiman bloke entered a policeman robot-type that got run over faster than Ellen Page's career. In the end, the robots that were the least crap were Edd's Jason Statham and Drakeknight's Robophobe. For god's sake, this next match better be a bloody good one.
Knowing SONM's roboteers, it will be! Let's take a look at today's contestants!

AlternativeAntagonist has entered Henry the Hoover! Previously in SONM Robot Wars, Henry's cleaning sweetheart, Hetty, was destroyed by Destructor! With raging dustlust in his veins, will Henry win in the name of his sweetums?

From one red contestant to another, Row101 has entered Robot Santa! During the days of Xmas, Robot Santa brings terror all over the world, be them naughty or VERY naughty! Being the third Matt Groening creation in SONM Robot Wars, will Robot Santa complete the set?

Now we move from America to Japan with our next contestant! Rik has entered Porygon2! The infamous virtual Pokémon, this creature's previous form sent many a child to the hospital! Will Porygon2 bring the same fate to our contestants*?
*Please do not watch this fight if you are prone to seizures, we are not liable for that happening because of this warning. So there.

Finally, we have the spookiest contestant in SONM Robot Wars! Aren142 has entered a human skeleton! This skeleton is blessed with strong bones and good calcium, provided by the almighty Mr Skeltal! With these powers on the skeleton's side, this should be over doot-sweet!

We've met our contestants, folks! So it's time for the battle, which will take place on Xmas day!

3, 2, 1, ACTIVATE

As soon as the fight starts, Robot Santa charges towards Henry, intending to take him down first! As Santa has heard from his buddy, Destructor, Henry vacuum cleaners are powerless against slams! Santa grabs Henry's nozzle, ready to swing Henry high in the sky as he lifts the cleaning crusader! But, Henry didn't want to go down without a fight. No sir, he didn't. As soon as Robot Santa picked him up, Henry swung to the side of Robot Santa, wrapping his nozzle around Santa's jolly neck in the process. As soon as he ran out of tubing to use, Henry blew air with all his might, causing the tube to expand. The tube grey larger and larger, until...

BANG!

Robot Santa was decapitated by Henry's powerful tube! Robot Santa goes down, unable to get back up! Henry has triumphed over the mechanical menace! Xmas is saved for future generations to enjoy, injury-free!

But, just as Henry is about to celebrate, a bright flash is seen from the other side of the arena. It must be the fight between Porygon2 and the skeleton! Porygon2 blinds Henry and the onlookers as he tackles the skeleton, bringing them both up to a wall! The skeleton, however, doesn't look harmed at all! Not even a single scratch! Porygon2 was dumbfounded. How could he survive such a powerful blow? It was time for the Virtual Pokémon to use his ultimate attack: Hyper Beam! Porygon2 sends out the almighty blast with all of it's power! With a blinding light, the skeleton is shot dead-on by the laser, almost disappearing in the light! The beam stops, as Porygon2 takes a breather. Surely the skeleton would be dead, right? WRONG!
The skeleton is still there! Looking like nothing had happened! The skeleton steps up to the weakened Porygon2, smiles and tells him:
"Those moves don't mean squat to me, son. I'm a ghost-type."
With that, the skeleton deals the final blow with an almighty skeletal slap! Porygon2 is unable to battle! The Skeleton wins!

THE WINNERS ARE HENRY THE HOOVER AND THE SPOOKY SKELETON! BREAK OUT THE CHAMPAGNE!

Well, wasn't that fun? Next, we see our final match with Group Five, so don't miss out on the almighty spectacle! But until next time, close the windows and lock the doors, we're going to see SONM Robot Wars!
Last edited by Troggy on Mon Sep 19, 2016 9:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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